Dear Mama

I want to say I know that not all of us are fortunate enough to experience the unconditional love of a mother. Understanding that circumstances often arise that leave behind motherless children was a concept that was foreign to me until I had a classmate whose mother passed away while we were in middle school. This was further affirmed some time later when I witnessed one of my best friend’s contentious and often violent relationship with her own mother. There seemed to always be a piece of her missing whenever she brought up her feelings about an incident with her mom. It was difficult to comprehend the notion that every child doesn’t get to experience a loving relationship with their mother. Thankfully, my mother is everything I seek to be with my children. Funny, kind, hard-working, and loyal to a fault are just some of the adjectives to describe my mom who I also consider to be my closest confidant.

Growing up, there were moments when I did not appreciate having that one person in my corner who I could always depend on no matter what. Tense times between us never lasted long as eventually it would be revealed the she was mostly right about everything. The funny thing about growing up is that often we can’t wait to become adults and not have the constant supervision of our moms just to run to them first once we do. There is a certain wisdom that comes with being in charge of a living being. My mom tried to do the best she knew how to direct us on a path that would hopefully see us flourish. This tumultuous job of raising children, be them yours biologically or not, it is probably the most difficult task of all.

Sometimes when you are able to see your mother frequently, you forget how precious the moments spent together can be. I’ve admittedly taken for granted the opportunities that I have to fully embrace spending time with my mother while there are so many others that cannot.  As my parents’ age, gracefully entering their golden years, those opportunities to love on them become less and less. Understanding time waits for no one is a gift given to those who have lost someone or something prematurely.  This realization becomes bone-chillingly apparent when you attend the large family gatherings and special occasions and you begin to fully notice that some loved ones are no longer there to celebrate with you.  

The thought of losing my mother is one of my very worst fears. There is a deep sense of melancholy I feel when the thought of losing my mother occasionally sneaks into my mind. It can feel like you are hanging over cliff and know that an impending doom is grasping at you. Whenever the news that a friend or acquaintance has lost their mother, an immense volume of sympathy pours out to them. Of course death is inevitable for us all which is why celebrating our mothers while they are here is imperative. Showering them with appreciation for one day out of the year is not nearly enough as we could never fully repay our gratitude for all they have been to and for us. Mothers are so much more than the vessel by which we’ve all arrived. They are our first friends, fierce protectors, and real life superheroes. Here’s to wishing all the mothers, including mine who always found a way out of none, a joyous Mother’s Day!

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